The first 40 days: Why rest is essential after birth

After the intensity of pregnancy and birth, many new parents feel pressure to “bounce back” - to tidy the house, host visitors, or prove they’re coping. But the truth is this: your body and mind need deep rest after giving birth.

In traditional cultures around the world, the first 40 days after birth are treated as sacred - a time for recovery, nourishment, and bonding. As an independent midwife, supporting families, I often remind parents that this period is just as important as pregnancy itself.

Your body has just done something extraordinary. 

Whether you gave birth at home, in a birth centre or in hospital, your body has achieved an incredible transformation. Your uterus is shrinking, your hormones are adjusting, your blood volume is returning to normal and your tissues are healing. That’s a lot of internal work - and it requires energy and rest.

Rest doesn’t mean lying in bed all day (although sometimes it should!) It means slowing down, listening to your body, and allowing others to care for you while you focus on recovery and connection.

The “Fourth Trimester”

Think of the first six weeks as your baby’s “fourth trimester”. Your newborn still depends on the warmth, scent and rhythm of your body. You are both adjusting to a whole new world  - one feed, one cuddle, one nappy at a time.

Trying to rush this stage often leads to exhaustion, anxiety and sometimes delays in physical healing. When you rest, your body produces more milk, your mood stabilises and your confidence as a parent grows.

Nourishment and support

Rest also means being nourished - in every sense. Eat warm, comforting foods. Sip plenty of fluids. Ask for help (and accept it!) If friends or family want to visit, let them bring a meal or fold some laundry.

Practical support allows you to truly recover. If you have a partner, remind them that their care for you helps care for your baby too.

Creating a calm nest

Think of your home as a gentle cocoon - your baby’s first safe space. Keep it warm, quiet and simple. The world can wait. Your only job in those first weeks is to heal, feed and bond.

Simple things like dim lighting, soft music and short, slow walks when you’re ready can make a huge difference.

A midwife’s perspective

When I visit families after birth, I can always see the difference between those who’ve allowed themself to rest - and those who’ve tried to do it all.  Rested parents look calmer, more confident and often recover faster. Your worth isn’t measured by productivity; it’s reflected in your presence, your health and your connection with your baby.

Gentle reminder

You’ve just done one of the most physically and emotionally demanding things a human can do. Give yourself permission to heal. The laundry, dishes and messages will wait - your recovery can’t.